no comments.

Now that I know why do people write blogs, my next concern is why do people comment/follow blogs.

I have no idea how a girl behaves when she sees a new blog. But I do know something.

1. Girls like to be 'commented', though they don't comment.
2. They comment because you commented. Tit-for-Tat.
3. They dont comment. They update their blog, saying they were busy doing something more important and would comment soon (before world ends).
4. They comment because there are nice girls too.
5. They comment. Exploiting Tit-for-Tat.
6. They do comment/follow, if its worth doing.
7. Are you a frequent commenter on my blog?

Now, guys are so generous, you see. They comment and follow most of the blogs. Just for 2 simple reasons.

1. The blog is just amazing.
2. The blog author is a girl.
   

PS: This is meant to be a partially-funny-partially-true post. No offense, please.

Photo Credit: Miamiamia / Image

its really in their blood.

I happened to read a few new blogs lately and most of those blogs were of girls'. I was surprised that they all have one thing in common - 'About Me'.

They all have written pretty well the same thing. Below mentioned are the 'words/phrases' I happened to notice.

1. Imperfect
2. Perfectly Imperfect
3. A blend of Imperfections

etc etc etc...

I dont know if they wrote specifically about them or about girls in general. Maybe, no girl on the planet is perfect. Maybe, like I said in one of my post, they are just showing off.

Maybe, its really in their blood. khe khe...

PS: This is just my observation. Please dont feel offended.

Photo Credit: Sam Hatch / Image

you have got to be rude at times.

My email to Odyssey

Hi,

I regret to say that I'm completely disappointed by your customer service. I had purchased a book online around 9 days back. And I'm yet to receive the book. It shows 'yet to deliver' and Shipped date is left blank when I checked in the Odyssey Website. During the time of purchase, the book was supposed to get delivered within 6 days.

I once again want to say that I'm very much disappointed by Odyssey and I made a mistake purchasing book thru Odyssey. This will be my first and last purchase. I just lost my Rs.330.

FYI, I even wrote a blog post about my experience with Odyssey. I just wanted to pass my experience with my friends too, so that they wont make the same mistake.

Thanks a lot for your services.

If you really mean to 'care' (as in your email id) your customers, please do respond with the status. Thanks a lot.

Hoping you would reply before the world ends.
Anoop KR

***

Odyssey's reply

Dear Sir,

First, we sincerely apologize for the delay.

We are extremely regretted for having you write a mail to us on letting you disappointed. We are making all our efforts to procure the book "THE SPY WHO CAME IN FROM THE COLD". We are keeping it on priority, once the book is available with us probably by Tuesday(9th Nov), we will ship it to your address immediately.

We will keep you updated on Monday on the availability of the book.

Thanks & regards,

Customer Care
Odyssey360

visa fuckin interview.

Okay. Probably this will be my first and last post for this month. I'm also on the verge of losing interest to update my blogs.

Few days back, I had my first every US VISA interview. I fucked it. Not that I screwed the interview. Actually my VISA got approved. But I fucked the fucking VISA formalities. My company arranged my accommodation in a hotel nearby US embassy. I was asked not to carry anything other than the file which they gave me and also my degree certificates just in case. I did exactly what they asked me to do. I dint even carry my wallet.

The guy who checks the VISA fee receipt and other details caught me saying the photo on the application is no good. My spectacle frame crosses my eye ball and for security reasons, they asked me to get another photo. FUCK! I ran back to my hotel room to get the money to take the photo.

It did not end there. I stood behind the queue again waiting for my turn. And now, the guy in the counter asked me to press my right-hand-finger-tips on god-knows-what. I pressed my finger tips as he said. Unfortunately he was a malayalee and after noticing my permanent address, he scolded me in malayalam asking to keep my hands proper blah blah blah.. I wanted to shout 'FUCK YOU!' What on earth finger-tips mean? It means finger fucking T-I-P-S. Not the whole finger. I was fucked. Thank god he dint have the authority to reject my VISA. That would be the last thing I want and the first thing he wanted. khe khe khe...

Luckily, my VISA got approved and flying to US on Sunday July 11th. OMG! My first ever travel outside India. Hope I wont screw it during the immigration check. khe khe khe...

Photo Credit: Pedro Maia / Image

i'm not 18. please.

Situation 1: with friends
I called my friends to invite them for my engagement. I text them too. And 99% of my friends are surprised to hear that I'm getting engaged so soon. They ask if 'Child Marriage' is still on at my place. WTF :|

Situation 2: office
My manager came to my cubicle and asked my colleague if he had any problem to go to US. She looked at me and said I obviously wont have any problem cuz I'm not married. I was like shocked to hear that. I told my manager that I'll get committed soon. She looked at me with her mouth opened. She asked 'How old am I?'

FACT 1:
OK. Everyone wanna hear they look so young. But not me. I sometimes get so irritated to accept the fact that I look so young though I'm 26. I dont grow much of beard or mustache. Lot of people used to tease me for that. I reply to them asking to think about how they look after 10 years.

FACT 2:
I use Santoor soap BTW. I'm feeling so lucky. khe khe khe...

so, will that help?

One of my colleague is gonna get married. Today he came to me and asked for my help.

'I don't know how to talk to girls. And I need your advice. I know you are an expert.' He said.

I was shocked to hear that. But I dint show it. ;) khe khe khe... Ok. Jokes apart. He explained the situation. He phoned his girl few days back and his call was on waiting. He tried to call her 2-3 times. But still it was on waiting and she dint bother to cut it and call him back. He, obviously, got tensed. After sometime she called him but he refused to answer. She kept calling for sometime and finally he answered.

SPLASH! THAMAAAR!! BANG!!! *he shouts, she cries blah blah blah...*

So, this is a problem with guys mainly. They get possessive very soon. In fact, guys fall in love very soon. And for that reason, they get possessive. I guess girls do like it, thought they wont expect guys to shout at them. I told this to my friend. His facial expressions clearly said he dint understand a word! I made it simple.

'Next time when you see her number busy, just tell her that her voice is so cute and he don't want others to hear her sweet voice.' I said.

PS: I've a best friend. One day she will also get married. So what if her guy asks her not to talk to me saying the same dialogue, maybe after reading my blog :O I cant stand that. Now the question is, will I ask my girl not to talk to others??? :D

PPS: I'm wondering why the hell he said I'm an expert in talking to girls. Seriously! :O :D And sorry if you people think the title, picture and the blog-post are no way related to each other (on earth) :D

Photo Credit: Roman Balog / Image

hope this idea will work :D

Me: OK. Hi... My name is Anoop. I've been watching you since last...hmmm I dono. You know, you look beautiful and maybe that's the reason I got attracted to you. I don't wanna take risk loving you just cuz you are beautiful. On the other hand I don't wanna lose you also for maybe you are good at heart too. I hope you are not committed. I wont be in this company for long. My last date here is April 16. So don't fear that I would be following you all the time. I wont ask your mobile number also. You can just drop the idea if you feel I'm not lucky enough to be your friend. So, can we be friends?

Girl: Oh my God! Who are you?!

Me: Sorry, I dint mean to give a shock or make this conversation this lengthy. I dint rehearse this and this is my first time.

Girl: Hmmm... What's your....?

Me: Wow! Thanks! My ID is 2*4*4*!

PS: This is a complete fiction. I saw this girl in the cafeteria and I was just dreaming how it would be if I just give her a shock like that. :D Will she respond the way that girl did in my dream? :P

PPS: Thanks to MS Office Communicator. Employees across the company can chat each other using their employee ID.

they just vanish. gone. kaput.

Parents search for good alliances for their sons or daughters. To make the process easy, sons and daughters love someone and introduce them to their parents. So far so good.

Parents take this to the next level. They inform the news to their relatives. Phones start ringing. Some vessels break. They shout. They say the guy is not lookin good. He is having specs. She is not having long hair. She dont wake up early in the morning etc etc etc...

They make the slightest of problems very big. We are forced to agree what they say. Parents are happy, relatives are happy. They make us spends lakhs of rupees on the wedding day. They invite 100s of people. 30k worth photo albums, 10k worth DVDs blah blah blah... They are good at giving ultra superb ideas on how to be expensive but they dont care helping. At last parents spend minimum of 8-10 lakhs for the marriage.

After the marriage, guy and gal will spend 70% of the salary to repay the loan they borrowed from the bank. 70% of their time they spend fighting. They never care to see the DVD or the photo album worth 30k. They curse the day they got married. Parents see their 10lakhs rupees going in vain.

Now, where are these so-called-relatives? They just vanish. Gone. Kaput. They were in front to give comments, to talk against love marriage, to tell them how to show-off during marriage, to eat a lot.

What's the verdict? Promote love marriage. Khe khe khe... Marry someone you love, not the ones your parents or your love. Dont spend money for marriage. Do register-marriage :P Anyway, you are gonna blame that day. So why spending money for it? Dont expect anythin from your relatives.

Photo Credit: Konrad Mostert / Image

wAy tOo wHaT? pErSoNaL?? o.O

My Life SuCkS! bIg tYm!
the name itself says My Life! do you mean to say, havin such a name for my blog, you want me write about Rocket Science or UFOs or C++ or about movies?? What??
Gimme a break, Guys...

If you guys feel offended, Pardon ME! m extremely sorry... :P